


The long way home

by unacaritafeliz



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: 5+1 Things, Getting Together, Multi, Post-Canon, some of this is gonna hurt but I promise it'll be okay
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-03
Updated: 2020-11-03
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:27:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,177
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27366538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unacaritafeliz/pseuds/unacaritafeliz
Summary: This whole time Suki had thought Zuko had been oblivious, that he hadn't realised what she and Sokka were doing, that the soft and constant affection they gave to him was so different from the affection that they give to the rest of their friends. But it's clear to her now that Zuko's always known exactly how they feel about him, exactly what they were gearing themselves up to ask.And he's telling them no.[five times Zuko doesn't let himself be with Sokka and Suki, and one time he does].
Relationships: Sokka/Suki (Avatar), Sokka/Suki/Zuko (Avatar), Sokka/Zuko (Avatar), Suki/Zuko (Avatar)
Comments: 14
Kudos: 153





	The long way home

It happens like this:

"Mai and I are back together," Zuko says, voice quiet in the warm evening air, and something inside Suki _aches_.

Zuko's coronation party rages on below them, but somehow he and Suki have carved a quiet space for themselves on top of an empty palace balcony, alone with only the moon for company. They're standing next to each other, shoulders not quite touching, and Suki's glad that Zuko can't see the expression on her face right now.

It's not that Suki dislikes Mai. Sure, Mai helped Azula take down the Kyoshi Warriors, but Zuko _burned down Kyoshi Island_ , and Suki's long since forgiven him for that. It's just... Mai is a new and unknown variable in an already complicated equation, and Suki knows that Zuko dating Mai is going to change the entire dynamic between herself, Sokka and Zuko, even if she doesn't know how just yet.

"That's great, Zuko," Suki says, without really feeling it. "I'm really happy for you."

"Yeah," says Zuko. His fingers grip the balcony harder than they need to. It takes a fair bit of self control for Suki not to tangle their fingers together to get him to relax, the way she used to do on Ember Island. "I've loved her for a very long time, I think, and she's a good person, when she's not being bossed around by Azula. And she rescued us at Boiling Rock, and she..."

"Hey," says Suki, softly, nudging her shoulder into his to pause his rambling. She's not really in the mood to hear Zuko talk up other girls right now. "You don't have to justify it to me."

Zuko takes a subtle step to the side, just big enough so that their shoulders no longer tough. Suki turns to face him, wide eyed, confused and a little hurt because it was just a friendly gesture, and Zuko's never shyed away from physical affection from her before. Zuko's grip is still strong on the balcony railing, and he stares straight ahead into the dark night, carefully and obviously not meeting Suki's gaze.

"I think maybe I do," says Zuko. His voice is quiet, but the words hit Suki harder than a hippopotamus-lion.

This whole time she had thought Zuko had been oblivious, that he hadn't realised what she and Sokka were doing, that the soft and constant affection they gave to him was so different from the affection that they give to the rest of their friends. But it's clear to her now that Zuko's always known exactly how they feel about him, exactly what they were gearing themselves up to ask.

_And he's telling them no._

"Oh," Suki breathes, as the weight of the rejection settles painfully on her chest. She turns back to face the balcony, so she doesn't have to face him. "I see."

"Yeah," Zuko says, with a horridly fake chuckle that Suki can't stand to hear. From the corner of her eye, she sees his head move to glance at her before looking away. "It's nothing personal, really, I just don't think it would be the right thing for me, now, you know? I love Mai, and I have to focus on being Fire Lord, so it'd just..."

"It's okay, Zuko," Suki interrupts, even though it doesn't feel okay at all right now. But it has to be okay, because this is how Zuko feels and she'll respect his feelings, no matter how much it hurts. "You don't have to justify it to me."

"I'm sorry," Zuko repeats, quietly. "Thank you for understanding, Suki."

They lapse into silence, staring out into the dark night. Suki has never had a problem existing in silence with anyone before, but she feels out of her depth now. The air feels suffocating around them, and the small amount of space between them feels like an entire universe.

She has no idea what to do. She has no intention of letting her friendship with Zuko collapse just because he doesn't want to be anything more, but she doesn't know how to do that while she's hurting like this. Maybe she just needs some time to come to terms with it, before she can be the friend Zuko deserves.

She should go back to the party. Sokka will make her feel better, even if she'll have to hide the reason for her feelings from him, until he talks to Zuko himself.

"I think I should go find the others," Suki says. She looks over at Zuko, taking one last opportunity to admire the sharp, sweet lines of his face before she locks her feelings up in a box forever. "I'll see you tomorrow, Zu."

She almost reaches out to hug him before thinking better of it and letting her hands fall to her sides. She gives him a very awkward bow, unsure of what else to do. It's probably the respectful move, since he's Fire Lord, but it doesn't feel right. From the awkward head nod he gives her in return, Zuko doesn't think it feels right either.

Suki turns, making her way towards the staircase that'll take her back down to the party below. Part of her wants Zuko to call out to her, do something to reassure her that they're still friends, leave her with something more than this rejection. But she know he won't. Reassuring people isn't something Zuko's really good at.

"Suki!' Zuko calls, and Suki's turned back to face him before he's even finished speaking. She's never so pleased at being proven wrong in her life. "Could you... Do you think you could tell Sokka?"

Suki opens her mouth, but no sounds come out. She's _horrified_. Even if Zuko doesn't want them to date them, he's still their friend, and the least he can do is tell Sokka himself. Sokka is the kindest, sweetest, more giving person in the world and he deserves better than a second-hand rejection that's going to break his heart even worse than Zuko's already broken hers.

"I just... I think it'd be better coming from you," Zuko says.

"It wouldn't," Suki says. "Sokka deserves to hear it from you, Zuko."

"Suki," Zuko says, softly. "Please."

Suki should really insist that Zuko do it himself, she knows she should, but Zuko looks so _vulnerable_ right now, in a way she's never seen him look before. And rejected or not, she knows she'd do anything to keep that look off his face.

"Sure," she says, her fingers curled into fists behind her back. "I'll tell Sokka."

"Thank you," says Zuko, as he turns to stare back into the darkness once more. "I'll see you tomorrow, then, Suki."

He won't see them tomorrow. If Suki knows Sokka at all, he'll get them out of Caldera city at the first possible moment he can. She wouldn't even blame him. She'd be mortified if she'd been rejected through someone else too.

"See you, Zu," she says, so softly she doesn't think he'll hear it.

She turns around to return to the party.

She lets him go.


End file.
